This early morning, my thoughts lead me to reflect on those times when our work, our efforts, no matter how well intentioned or focused, dedicated or talent filled, only result in nothing. You know? When you’ve been steadily hard at work but just spinning your wheels? After hours upon hours, months and months of diligent effort? Doing all you know how to do in your current situation and yet nothing comes of it? What then? Continue reading
Late night, somewhere before 4 a.m.
Tears. Yes, tears. That’s what I find always come when God speaks so specifically to my need, especially when I least expect it. It’s hard not to get overwhelmed. After all, it’s the God of the universe Who is talking to me.
(for those of you who don’t get as teary, stick with me…)
I woke up in the middle of the night needing a “midnight” snack. I got up, fixed myself some plain yogurt with maple syrup, and sat on my couch for a bit in the dark so my eyes wouldn’t have to adjust too much. (The light of the refrigerator was about all I could take.) As thoughts of yesterday and concerns for tomorrow entered my head, I just laid them out before the Lord in brief, sleepiness inducing me to confess them quickly without much filtering. With my late-night confessional over and rumbly in my tumbly addressed, I went back to bed.
But I didn’t feel sleepy anymore. Continue reading
9:53 a.m. On iTunes: Relient K – Two Lefts Don’t Make a Right, But Three Do
I’ve forgotten how to have fun.
There. I said it. Of all I’ve been pondering this morning, this is one of the thoughts that leapt to the forefront.
It’s been about 3 weeks since I said goodbye to full-time employment.
I’m having a ridiculously stressful day already. I’m ready to turn off the computer, turn out the lights, and just go home. I don’t smoke, but I just asked my coworker if I could take a smoke break because I feel so wound up. Funny how this comes on a day when I left the house so determined to rely on God’s grace. Guess this is the big test…
So you know what? I’m going to hold on to this no matter what:
Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you.